Friday, August 16, 2013

In Between Times

It's been a month since I found my lump. It really illustrates how life can change in an instant.

I'm now recuperating from my 2nd surgery and today am feeling quite washed out. The pathology results showed the cancer to be high grade and therefore fast growing but thankfully not in my nodes...I'll still need chemo but at least I can feel relatively reassured about my prospects.

We have been receiving lots of lovely flowers...they are so beautiful

There's also been lots of food delivered which Saint Mike particularly loves!!! Our chest freezer is coming in very handy:)

Life goes on and August is a birthday month in our house -Littlest KAT turning 6 and Oldest KAT soon to turn 13!!!

Middle KAT is keeping us amused with her antics...she's found a new use for the lovely breast support cushion (we call it the "booby cushion")...

Our cancelled overseas trip is still there in the background giving me pangs of sadness...emails from French hotels with check-in info which we no longer need:( I know it will still be there when I recover but I'm not feeling very trusting in making plans I may not get to fulfil.

For now I continue to recover and think of the chemo ordeal body needs all the nurturing I can give it so I'm on the Green Smoothie bandwagon!




Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Out the other side

I'm drugged up on endone but wanted to do a little post for those special people like my friend Carmel who are far away and not on Facebook so have spent the day praying for me and worrying!!

Pre surgery I was extremely nervous. Sentinel node injections went smoothly and were far less painful than Dr Google had suggested! Not a walk in the park but not gripping the edge of the gurney either:)

Every single staff interaction I've had today has been lovely...the Mater in Sydney is a place brimming with caring, compassionate people.

Waiting for surgery was emotional but I had Saint Mike to hold my hand.

Being roused in post-op I felt drowsy and in pain but not nauseous and knew I was in good hands. By the time I got to the ward I just really needed to see my gorgeous people go through this without a loving partner is beyond me.

I'm on hourly obs so can't really go to sleep...I'm amusing myself by watching The Great Australian Bake Off and reading the many many messages from friends and family on Facebook and text.

I've also spoken to Oldest and Middle KAT and love that I am once again humbled by what beautiful and caring girls they are:)

Signing off now....thanks and love to all my friends and family who are getting their updates here!

Monday, August 5, 2013

FBC update

So it's the night before my lumpectomy and I've polished off a glass and a bit of wine and nibbled on some Parmesan biscuits. Pathetic final meal before 20% of my boob gets lobbed off isn't it!

It's been a roller coaster of a couple of weeks. Emotionally draining is an understatement. I went through the motions if seeing a Plastic & Reconstructive surgeon to consider if it made sense to "fix" things up at the same time the Breast Surgeon took out the other nasty bits. I weighed it up and decided that I'd prefer to focus on aesthetics later...there's always the chance that the biopsy reveals that the margins aren't clear and further surgery is required...if I had the breast tissue moved around by the plastic surgeon there would be no way of just whipping out a little bit more margin....instead it would be a case of take the entire breast off!

My Breast Surgeon agreed that there's a 1 in 5 chance that additional surgery is required to take further clean margin around the lump so it just didn't add up to me. So for the foreseeable future I will be officially lopsided!

I have had a couple of calls from the Breast Care nurse whose job it is to ease my way through the virtual quagmire of information that you are confronted with as part of this journey. She recommended I avoid google if at all possible. Being the non compliant sort of girl that I am I haven't completely complied with this request! When I have visited Dr Google its frightened the life out of me and I end up a screaming, crying mess!

My wonderful school community has rallied and my church community has also been lovely (thanks Tonia). I feel well supported and we now have a freezer full of food and a laminated schedule for the younger KATs to get them around after school. We feel really touched at the effort people have gone to on our behalf.

I will be referring to my ailment as FBC....if the B'C stands for Breast Cancer I will let you work out what the F stands for!!!

I know that some of my friends do like to get my thoughts via KATcapers so despite not wanting to only focus on the FBC I feel it only appropriate to update the blog status:)

I'd like to say bring on tomorrow but I'm scared and am fully aware that the surgery will reveal the full pathology and I may not like what I hear! I'm scared and not afraid to admit it.

Signing of for now:))


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