So it's the night before my lumpectomy and I've polished off a glass and a bit of wine and nibbled on some Parmesan biscuits. Pathetic final meal before 20% of my boob gets lobbed off isn't it!
It's been a roller coaster of a couple of weeks. Emotionally draining is an understatement. I went through the motions if seeing a Plastic & Reconstructive surgeon to consider if it made sense to "fix" things up at the same time the Breast Surgeon took out the other nasty bits. I weighed it up and decided that I'd prefer to focus on aesthetics later...there's always the chance that the biopsy reveals that the margins aren't clear and further surgery is required...if I had the breast tissue moved around by the plastic surgeon there would be no way of just whipping out a little bit more margin....instead it would be a case of take the entire breast off!
My Breast Surgeon agreed that there's a 1 in 5 chance that additional surgery is required to take further clean margin around the lump so it just didn't add up to me. So for the foreseeable future I will be officially lopsided!
I have had a couple of calls from the Breast Care nurse whose job it is to ease my way through the virtual quagmire of information that you are confronted with as part of this journey. She recommended I avoid google if at all possible. Being the non compliant sort of girl that I am I haven't completely complied with this request! When I have visited Dr Google its frightened the life out of me and I end up a screaming, crying mess!
My wonderful school community has rallied and my church community has also been lovely (thanks Tonia). I feel well supported and we now have a freezer full of food and a laminated schedule for the younger KATs to get them around after school. We feel really touched at the effort people have gone to on our behalf.
I will be referring to my ailment as FBC....if the B'C stands for Breast Cancer I will let you work out what the F stands for!!!
I know that some of my friends do like to get my thoughts via KATcapers so despite not wanting to only focus on the FBC I feel it only appropriate to update the blog status:)
I'd like to say bring on tomorrow but I'm scared and am fully aware that the surgery will reveal the full pathology and I may not like what I hear! I'm scared and not afraid to admit it.
Signing of for now:))