Hursuit or not?

Oldest KAT is rapidly emerging into adolescence. She is tentatively beginning to spread her wings and it is challenging for both of us.

Personal grooming has been and I'm sure will continue to be a topic of discussion. My goal is that she comes out the other side of this at times difficult physical transformation with her self esteem intact and retains a positive view of her body...that it is her friend not her enemy!

I am using a board on Pinterest to help express the thoughts and feelings that I want my KATs to be in touch with as they grow up...it's called "Inspiration for daughters".

On the weekend we were hanging out together and I asked her if any of her peers had started discussing hair removal...legs, underarms, eye-brows (I will admit to crossing my fingers that the pubic hair wasn't a topic!!!)

We had a bit of a chuckle about the issue of hairy legs and did a Pinterest search on the topic! Found a couple of funny quotes (including above pointed example) that capture the opposing views quite succinctly!!!

I myself am fairly middle of the road in the hairy stakes...I won't go into specifics but suffice to say I'm not at either extreme!!

It was good to broach the subject and make sure that as with all things I want her to feel comfortable talking to me. Amidst way too many moments of impatience on both our sides of late it was a reassuring parent/soon-to-be teen interaction:)

How do you rank on the scale of hursuitness???

Balancing the Bumps with the Blessings

2012 was a mixed bag for me. On an individual level it was a year of stumbling. I want to say failing but I've done enough years of cognitive behaviour therapy/mindfulness training to know that's not helpful self-talk.

I don't mention these stumbles to dwell on them, it's merely to document:

1. My history of yo-yo dieting continues...the "yo" rebounded with a bang - all weight lost in 2011 regained. Not enough words to convey the self-loathing that's ensued.
2. Work was sporadic, a few good months to be followed by a hiatus when the stair tumble occurred and my confidence is now so low that I feel anxious just thinking about the prospect of ever working again.
3. Like many men his age, Saint Mike has been struggling with a minor mid-life crisis. Fortunately as the amazingly resilient bloke that he is the impact has been confined to our intimacy suffering a few low points but with focused attention all is well in that garden:)
4. Illness and injury were a factor in 2012 for me and also for family members. Sadly the end of the year meant the loss of my brother-in-law, leaving behind twin girls our middle KATs age which breaks my heart. Added to this my lovely mother-in-law is being wracked by the relentless progression of Parkinson's and my heart is heavy with the burden this puts on her.

Fortunately these challenges are outweighed by the blessings of my beautiful KATs and Saint Mike along with the pleasure and respite that comes from having constant contact with my amazing siblings and their partners and children and my lovely friends near and far that fill my heart with love.

 

1. Oldest KAT graduated from primary school receiving the Dux of the school award. It was a wonderful moment. She is apprehensive about high school but that is to be expected:)
2. Middle KAT is our very own sporting prodigy....she made the rep teams in both basketball and netball and is a very promising swimmer to boot. Even better she has emerged from year 4 as guileless and effervescent as she entered.
3. Youngest KAT amazes us with her maturity and intelligence...she is truly the 3rd child. We went to the pool yesterday and she was distraught to be without her flippers which we had assumed SHE would pack! We both agreed that this is typical of the high expectations we have for her at 5 compared to the other two who would no sooner have even got their towels out than pack their own goggles and flippers!! She is off to big school next year and my heart is heavy to lose our special times together.

The dawn of a New Year this time round is not about resolutions and turning over any new leaf. It is about being thankful for the blessings and moments of joy that I was fortunate to have in 2012 and being hopeful that these will continue into 2013.

 

I love my family and I am grateful to have these blessings.

 

Releasing my inner westie

It's been a while since I've posted about any of my insecurities and hang-ups on KATcapers.

I try to keep this place an angst-free zone.

Last week was an interesting week though. I had a run-in with a school parent that caused me equal parts distress, exhilaration and shame.

This parent has been the source of many moments of tension in the nearly seven years I've had the misfortune to be in her midst. On a good day I can stay above it all and just conclude that she's just not my cup of tea. On a bad day I want to smack her in the face and tell her to keep her opinions to herself and stay out of my business.

Suffice to say that my interaction with her last week could be described as a bad day...but only for her:)

My choice of language to encourage her to move her focus elsewhere can be described as colourful...that's if you're a sailor:). If you're the type of person that doesn't use bad language then you would be rightly appalled.

Ive spent most of my adult life trying to distance myself from being a westie. A good friend of mine has an expression she whips out to piss me off "you can take the girl out of the western suburbs but you can't take the western suburbs out of the girl"!

Well I can honestly say that I'm perfectly fine with being a westie even if I never appreciated it when I lived there. If being a westie means I call a spade a shovel. That I try and be a genuine person and not adopt airs and graces. If I respect other people and don't try and tell them what they should do.

All okay with me...proud to be one and I'll proudly wear the tshirt. The truth is that being a westie in my book is just being real as opposed to fake, insincere and shallow which are traits I seem to cop in spades from the more aspirational folk that I come into contact with these days.

So yes, this week I released my inner westie and shut down a vicious, mean-spirited mother who I will thankfully not have to deal with again once this year is over and oldest KAT is off to high school.

Here's to being real. Here's to the benefit of hindsight and realizing that what you've spent years running away from is the way you want to be. Here's to my inner westie.