A Bex and a good lie down

Yesterday was the final day of my 9 Week Challenge.  Are you ready for the number...........cue the rocky theme and accompanying fist pumping image..............

17.9kgs!!!!!

An average of almost 2 kilograms a week for 9 weeks!

I was happy for about 3 minutes as I breathed a sigh of relief that the challenge was over and I had managed to keep up my average for the final week given I have been rather under the weather and the furious exercise had unfortunately had to give way to common sense....so I'd been stressing that I wouldn't manage to lose weight in the final week.  My stressing was obviously good for the metabolism!

Why did my euphoria last 3 minutes?

Well after the weigh in and the tape measure were done, it was time for the 'after' photos.

I had been soooooooooooooooo excited about my 'after' shots, envisaging a visual transformation on par with the one that's been going on up in my head.  Unfortunately they failed to live up to my expectations....I got a glimpse of them and almost lost the plot. 

All I could see was a blob that didn't look any different from the 'before' blob next to it.

This is probably another one of life's little lessons about not building something up quite so much....a photo taken in poor lighting with a body that still needs to lose probably about the same amount of weight again to be in any way shape or form on the 'healthy' side was never going to look fantastic in a sports bra and undies!!!!

Cue the snide, nasty voice in my head "ha ha, you thought you looked pretty good didn't you??  Ha ha, you're still a fatty boom baa".  The voice in my head can't spell very well either!!

I kept a smile and a positive face on and left shortly after.  Took myself off to the local shopping centre and had a coffee and sourdough toast with jam as a 'treat' and tried desperately to make the voice shut up.

Alas, I'd opened the door and it proceeded to throw a loud and obnoxious party for the remainder of the day. 

By the time SM got home with a lovely bunch of red roses as congratulations I was a bit of an exhausted and emotional mess and ended up taking a couple of headache tablets and going to bed early....

Do I think my journey is over..............................NO!!!!

I have more weight to lose.  Even more importantly though I have more work to do to drown out that voice in my head that tells me I'm not worthwhile and aren't as good as I think I am.

So exhausting!!

Please don't think I'm hunting for compliments.  I'm not.  This is brutal honesty and no fishing is intended :)

I've stuck this picture on the fridge with the accompanying words to remind myself that the 'voice' is full of SHIT!!!!